Musings

I am becoming more and more aware of and able to understand myself as one with all that is.   The 'good and the bad', the 'wanted and unwanted', the 'friendly & fun' and the 'horrid and putrid'.  Its all inside of me - being projected out for me to see.  Every person, place & circumstance is represented by something inside of me.  What a way to look at the world!  I am still wrapping my head around this and as I do it is empowering me so much more as I 'own my shit so to speak' and by taking care of what is going on inside of me I can influence the outer - its the only way to change the exterior.  Try it! :o)   

I did my first liver gallbladder flush last night!  

For anyone who has been told they need their gallbladder removed DO THIS FIRST!!!

It was a very sensational experience, I could feel the liver purging what felt like stones for ~15 minutes.  The protocol I used was to take 5 Malic Acid tablets for 7 days with food, and on the 7th day before bed drink a mixture of 4 oz of fresh lemon juice with 4 oz high quality olive oil.  In about 2 hours I could feel the liver flush!  It was intense.  I am going to continue to do more rounds of flushing for optimal liver health.  :-)

When I was a kid (still am), a friend of mine painted a poem on the ceiling of the counselors lounge at our summer camp (painting on the walls was a good thing).  She wrote, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you its yours, if not it was never meant to be."  This poem triggered the bejesus out of me for many years.  I think I had a desperate tendency to cling for dear life to anything thing that I loved in fear of losing it.  Yet I could see the logic in the expression, especially when it comes to wild things like horses and birds et cetera; I love wild things and they need to be free in order to thrive.  Over the years this poem has been with me, and now I do my best to live by it.  :o)

Cancer was a choice point for me.  I used it as an opportunity to go all in on life.  And so far it is working.  :)  Now I make every effort to shed and transmute what is not me (what was conditioned from the modern western upbringing - what came through in the family lines).  This is allowing me to find, uncover and show up as my true authentic self, my divine embodiment in my human form.  Without the experience of carcinoma, I do not think I would have the privilege of becoming & being the REAL ME.

Yes, its an oxymoron. When looking at eternity, look into the now, backwards and forwards in time, centered in the present now moment, as it contains all of eternity. As a fractal of infinite time, the now contains all of eternity, just as eternity contains all now moments. 

There is a fundamental teaching of Buddhism that states that there are consequences to actions.  I like to think of this as 'if I love it turns out better'.  What ever I put love into improves, and it is helped to grow by my love, the love, love.  What a gift to be able to do that, influence that which I love with love; as well as that which is harder for me to love.  And all adding love does, is make it work out better; what ever it is, it gets better because of the love!

People deposit their money into the bank. The bank is only required to keep a small percent or a fraction of all deposits on hand at their central office. The rest of the capital is lent out to consumers as credit loans. This is how the Banks make their money, as interest that is earned from lending out other peoples money which is deposited in the bank. 

The money is not in the bank.

A better way to move mountains may be to adjust ourselves in relation to the mountain. :)

This can be paralleled to holistically transforming the self in alignment with personal growth and healing in comparison to the circumstance or person which may be upsetting or undesired. When we go inside and realign our self towards love, the external object or situation often adjusts itself in relationship to our individual transformation.  Maybe all it takes to move a mountain is to shift our internal perspective towards the mountain.    

Remember you are the mountain.

"Move mountain move"

'I will not. I am ancient. I am bigger than you.'

"Move mountain move"

'How dare you ask me to move.'

"Move mountain move"

'Who do you think you are asking me to move?'

"Move mountain move"

'I will give you an inch.'

"Move mountain move. I need a foot, please."

'I am old and tired and it is disrespectful of you to ask me to move.' 

"Move mountain move"

'I can give you 3 inches.'

"Move mountain move"

'I will be generous, here is 6 inches.'

"Move mountain move"

'Ok here is 9 inches of movement just for you.'

"Move mountain move"

'Alright dear one here is the foot that you have asked for.'

"Thank you mountain, thank you! I honor you. I respect you. I AM you!"

The other day I realized that we all exist in an infinite medium of infinite love.  This infinite love field around us is what makes up the universe and all that is.  It is the fabric of time-space-reality.  It is God/Goddess itself.  It may seem strange that bad things could happen from a medium of love.  This field of love adores us so much that it faithfully reflects back to us our creations. (conscious vs unconscious creation for another day)  Talk to the field of love that makes up the quantum soup around us.  Know that this infinite field of love cherishes you and responds to your every thought-feeling-belief as your faithful servant.  Love up this field of Love <3

Mid April, laying in bed in the early morning hours on the eve of the full moon, bathing in the moon light, I had the distinct visceral sensation of being the nexus of the universe for the first time. I am hereby reminding myself and you that it is possible to be the centroid of the universe as the love of god/goddess, and our lives can be fully about this practice! :)  

Paradox: the intersection of opposites pointing to the truth; or two seemingly opposing ideas revealing a hidden truth. I have been noticing several paradoxes in my life, revealing and validating the truth of the matter. When you can see both ends of the spectrum as valid and real and embody them and vibe them together simultaneously, then you are instantaneously transported to the harmonized center between them as the reality of what is; simply by honoring the polarities of existence you find peace. When you find both and, to be equally true; encompassing opposites brings true freedom and the win!   

Emotional connection and emotional availability are key to the next best version of self.   Like many, I saw emotional expression as a weakness or a liability - most likely due to a learned way of imbalanced emotional outlet.  With the help of a friend, I can now see that being able to generate authentic emotional connectivity and thus being vulnerable with another - from a place of wholeness and wellbeing is a fundamental skill worth developing.  My authentic emotional presence may be the ticket to the fulfillment of my dreams.  Balancing the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual aspects of the self is exquisitely important for a rich and rewarding human experience.  

Over a zoom call with a friend, I noticed she had no visible glabellar lines - the eleven lines that occur naturally between the brows, and so I commented on how youthful she looked, and I also shared how I was self conscious about mine. She shared that she had been using an oil treatment over night and that her lines had greatly diminished. Her secret recipe was to mix 7 parts castor oil with 3 parts baobab oil and frankincense oil in a small glass jar and apply the oil to her forehead at night with a piece of kinesiology tape over the oil and sleep like this. She reported that her lines diminished in a few months time. I have been using this protocol for several months and I have noticed my lines softening, although not yet completely disappearing. I have been experimenting with myrrh and sandalwood oils in addition to frankincense oil as well.  =)

I recently had a bout with cancer, squamous in the neck. For about 2 years I did not know if I was going to live or die. Nor did I know if I wanted to live or die. After about 2 years of staring death in the face, I decided, only somewhat recently - new years day of this year, that if I am going to live out the rest of my life, the ONLY WAY I am willing to live is to turn hell into platinum. My life was a bit hellish in some ways, not all, although many. I felt that I had lost everything that was important to me including myself. So the ONLY WAY that I would agree to live the second half of my life is to turn hell into platinum. So here I am, still alive, turning the Titanic. (tag, you're it - now it is your turn to transmute hell into platinum ... if you dare)

Namarana means first born in the Maasai language, and incidentally I am. Interestingly I was given this name without it being known that I am the eldest. :) After climbing Mt Kilimanjaro - led by several guides who were Maasai (along with guides who were of other clans like Chagga et cetra) and visiting a Maasai tribe in their village and singing and dancing with them and receiving a milk and honey blessing, I was given the name Namarana by my friend Trevor Maasai who helped lead me up and down Kilimanjaro. I am honored to be welcomed and named by the Maasai.    

I began finding heart rocks sometime around 2019. It was like my eyes were primed for them, catching my attention as I was walking. I ascribed no meaning to them at first other than delight in love being found. At this time a dear one was coming into my life in a beautiful way. I started wondering & hoping maybe the heart rocks were indicating a great love between us. Over time this dear one stepped back and amongst this challenge my health took a serious turn, and I spent the next few years wondering and questioning if I was going to live out the rest of my life. Overtime I was able to navigate some healing of my mental body, emotional body, physical body, spiritual body as well as my heart. It took great courage to do this work and it required help from many others to facilitate my transformation. Occasionally I would still find heart rocks during this time and I treasured them with great hope. Interestingly, I recently spent a week climbing Mt Kilimanjaro and I saw tons of heart rocks all over the trail. The realization that the heart rocks were for me all along, representing self love, is now at the forefront of my presence.  

I recently visited Africa, spending a week climbing Mt Kilimanjaro (a day with a Maasai tribe and 3 days in the Serengeti). Laying in my tent on the mountain, I could hear the guides and porters speaking Swahili all around me. To be honest, I totally UNDERESTIMATED the mountain in all ways: the climate, the terrain, the altitude, the magnitude of the ascent and descent, et cetera. Making it to the top of Africa was a mental game. Throughout the night and morning of the ascent there were ~40 mph winds facing us all the way to the top. The only way I found the strength was repeating the mantra, 'I think I can, I think I can' every step of the way, preceded by the realization that I am what matters in my life. The most astonishing thing about being on the mountain was the brilliance of the stars at night and seeing the milky way so clearly.

She say, 'Come, child, come."

And I say, "Yes mum."

None of us realize how powerful our minds truly are - the mind is absolutely influential. If we focus on what's good we find more good - if we focus on what is not good we see more of that. What we focus our minds on, consciously or unconsciously, is what we produce. By realizing how potent what goes on in the mind actually is, we can become conscious creators. We generate worlds, literally, with how we think. The stories we tell turn into our reality. Become conscious of how and what you are thinking about things, because it will come true! What is the engine running your wheels? Learn how to drive it, a.k.a. train your mind, because it will take you places. Where do you want it to go? 

I thought I was operating a Model T, turns out it's a Ferrari, and when you're performing with the ultimate V-12 - its best to know how to use it. So what's between your ears? I bet you've got a high performance model too...

About 10 years ago I went gluten free for health reasons. Since it has been out of my diet for so long now if I eat wheat from the US my body objects, from upset stomach to body pain & dizziness. Interestingly, when I am outside of the US I can easily digest wheat - which happens to many people. Plus eating barley & other grains with gluten from the US is fine. Turns out that wheat in the US is chemically processed and has many additional chemical additives. It is the chemicals that are making us ill. So what is the solution? Buy wheat on line that is made abroad and enjoy :) I am going to make some sourdough! 

Well, today is it, the day I launch beyond the stratosphere and into the realm of all possibility. By embodying mother god in me, as me, as self, I now embark upon infinite potential for the healing and growth of all humanity. Are you ready for the ride? Buckle up!